House of pain

8 Apr

Despite it being Easter and also the last day of Spring Break, today held a few hiccups that beg for release before the week begins. If you think I have a tendency to over-share, stop reading now. There is maybe nothing I won’t say.

I have a UTI. I’ll just put that right out there. It woke me up out of a dead sleep at 5:00 this morning, then every 10 minutes after that until 6:30 when I got my ass out of bed to call urgent care. By 10 am I had antibiotics in hand (note to self: thank husband for consistent willingness to pick up embarrassing prescriptions), and was told that within 24 hours those razor blades inhabiting my girl parts would be a thing of the past. So I spent all day oscillating between the urge to pee my pants and fear of the stabbing pain it would cause my Twinkie (thanks to Becca for loaning me the awesome nickname for my woo-hoo). The doctor said it was probably due to dehydration. Damn you, Palm Desert.

But worse than all that – yup, it gets worse – my little stunt double took his tricks one step too far today and earned himself a bloody face. As my spawn he has the genetic tendency to do exactly the opposite of what he is instructed, so despite the fact that we’ve told his a hundred times before to hold on for Chrissake to the swing handles…he didn’t. Instead he chose “Look mom, no hands!” and backflipped. Onto the concrete. He overshot the pillowy grass beneath him and lay himself out lip first on the driveway. I yelled a curse word and scooped him up, he cried with ice packs on his bloody nose, then we watched 2 Disney movies back to back. Disney makes everything better, FYI. And what’s really the most tragic part of it all is that today was little dude’s last day as a 3 year old. Yup, his 4th birthday is tomorrow, and he will spend it puffed up and breathing through his nose like a stuffy bulldog. Memories. Sweet, sweet memories.

That said, this weekend rocked, and I can’t wait for tomorrow. Happy Birthday little man.

2 Responses to “House of pain”

  1. kuophoto April 8, 2012 at 10:35 pm #

    Oh, girlie, how you have a way with words–even (or especially) when the news is wincingly bad. Soooo sorry for you & Mace. I do have a feeling that your sitch is worse than his, as adults have more of a tendency to suffer mentally while suffering physically. I do hope Disney made your Twinkie better. 🙂 And happy birthday to the tuff guy. We love you, Mason!! xo

    • FreeTheMom April 9, 2012 at 6:50 am #

      Thank-you Auntie – what a welcome to our 4th year with the little dude!

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