How to rule on Presidents Day

18 Feb

5:00 am: Start by getting up early despite the fact that it’s a national holiday, for God’s sake. Get a shit ton done because you’re an over-achiever and generally awesome. Decide that coffee raises your self-esteem.

8:00 am: Let the kids watch 7 movies in a row so you can play around on Adobe Ideas all day get your work done. Then publicly brag about said work. Try something like, “Hey suckas, y’all noticed the dreamy new banner hanging over the top of this site? Tight, am I right?! Cyber high-five!”. Expect the accolades to roll right in.

10:00 am: Make gluten free Nutella cookies “for your friends” then eat the whole batch except 3. Let the kids have one each, and another to split after dinner. Sugar is for moms, hoodlums, step off!

11:30 am: Take a break from the computer to wave at the gardener while wearing reading glasses & a robe, eating cookies, and imagining that his leaf blower would be a great way to get the crumbs out of your bra.

12:00 pm: Be a great hostess and have some out of town guests over. Be sure to change from your PJ’s into your nicest pair of sweats and the good slippers. Then change back into your PJ’s for the remainder of the afternoon, because you deserve it. .

1:00 pm: Think about mailing a work letter. Gawd, that was exhausting. Reward yourself with cookies.

2:00 pm: Consider a jack and diet to complete your “day of lush”. Or maybe a more appropriate daytime drink, like vodka. Or something that goes with cookies.

3:00 pm: Start wondering why the hell there was no school today. Google Presidents Day, or ask your 6 year old. Both will tell you that “Today is the birthday of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln…and all the other presidents.” Pretty much accurate. I’d like to thank the dead dudes for another day that I should be working but instead have spent wrangling little boys. And browsing pinterest. And eating cookies. Gah, who am I kidding, today effing rocks!

Love you peeps, and hope you’re enjoying the day as much as I am!

Anjale signature WEB

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20 Responses to “How to rule on Presidents Day”

  1. SLK February 18, 2013 at 3:28 pm #

    LMAO!! Thank you for the afternoon laugh, I needed it!

    • FreeTheMom February 18, 2013 at 3:33 pm #

      Oh GOOD! Glad to help πŸ˜‰

  2. crankycaregiver February 18, 2013 at 3:57 pm #

    Thank you so much for the chuckles! Always love the chuckles!

    • FreeTheMom February 18, 2013 at 4:06 pm #

      You are so welcome, Ms. Cranky!

  3. Processing the Light February 18, 2013 at 4:11 pm #

    Ahhhh, I’m not the only one πŸ˜‰

    • FreeTheMom February 18, 2013 at 4:15 pm #

      Just when we think we’re alone…we realize the world is full of other mamas πŸ˜‰

  4. Hubby February 18, 2013 at 4:42 pm #

    I hope you saved a cookie for me!

    • FreeTheMom February 18, 2013 at 5:10 pm #

      Eh, depends on how hard you worked today…

  5. steph February 18, 2013 at 5:15 pm #

    LOL!! omg anj~ that was hilarious!

  6. Kristen Berkenfield February 18, 2013 at 6:46 pm #

    Does putting on my “nice” black workout pants for unexpected company count?

    Sent from my iPhone

    • FreeTheMom February 18, 2013 at 7:02 pm #

      Ooohhhhhh yeeeah, you betcha! Glad to know we were keepin’ it the same level of classy πŸ˜‰

  7. Trina February 18, 2013 at 7:39 pm #

    That banner effing rocks sista!!! Nice work on that and all the rest! I am hiding out in the bathroom laughing at this post while daddy rocks the night time kiddo duties!

    • FreeTheMom February 18, 2013 at 7:46 pm #

      Hahhaa, love it! And THANK YOU!!! Xoxo

  8. Aryan February 18, 2013 at 8:34 pm #

    First of all, I love the makeover, job well done & you deserve each one of those cookies!
    Second, where you in my head today? I had so much sugar today maybe that is the side effect of having kids home:)
    Thanks for making me feel normal, XO

    • FreeTheMom February 19, 2013 at 5:06 am #

      Days off necessitate extra sugar consumption. It’s just a fact! πŸ˜‰

      • Aryan February 19, 2013 at 8:37 am #

        That is a fact and we stick to it!

        • FreeTheMom February 19, 2013 at 1:27 pm #

          The only problem is now my body is expecting another dozen cookies today…hmmm…

  9. betsybaum February 21, 2013 at 8:39 pm #

    Thank you for the chuckles. I love your descriptive style and how you use words to paint pictures! πŸ˜€

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